From my childhood, I already had a sense of fidelity and submission to the Church. I have good memories of some of my early formation, coming to know who God is, who I am, and who His Church is. When I began altar serving, I was extremely nervous because I was aware of the importance of the divine encounter that I was taking part in. After some time, I became more comfortable, but I continued to acknowledge the gravity of the liturgy.
My discernment began when I was in middle school, or possibly even late elementary school. One day after serving Mass, I was asked for the first time, “Have you ever thought about becoming a priest?” I was taken aback by the new idea. I hadn’t considered it before and it seemed jarring at first, but it quickly made a lot of sense. I knew there was a lot of time ahead of me and a lot of growth to go through. I kept it in mind, but it seemed like a distant possibility and never an imminent reality.
In my first year of college, I wrestled with my vocation somewhat intensely. I was worried that I was missing a call and I felt pressure to respond then and there. Through prayer I felt God telling me neither a definitive “yes” or “no”, but at least a “not now.” So, my vocation was put “on the back burner” for a while. I never outright dismissed the vocation, but I practically never engaged with it either. I finished college, started a job, and then COVID 19 hit. That time was difficult for me in several dimensions. My job was a poor fit, so I left it. My spiritual life, which was already somewhat unhealthy, got worse as Mass became virtual. The limited interpersonal interactions also took a toll on me.
Things took a turn in the right direction when I began a new job. I grew in confidence as I became an effective employee. COVID restrictions were eventually relaxed and I became deeply involved in community-building, bible studies, personal prayer, and intellectual formation about the Catholic Faith. During a retreat, while smiling at someone’s son, the father asked me if I wanted to be a dad. I realized at that moment that the, “not now,” I had heard from God happened quite a long time ago! I knew I had a book on discernment in my parents’ house, so I snuck it out one day after visiting them. Three days later I read the entire book and had an appointment with the Vocations Director!
As I’ve grown in my spiritual life and had various experiences concerning my vocation, I’ve been blessed with multiple consolations concerning my decision to enter seminary. Whatever God does with me next; I know His plan is infinitely better than mine. I trust Him to lead me where He needs me and where I need to be.
Prayer for Our Seminarians
Lord Jesus, as you once called the first disciples to make them fishers of men, let your sweet invitation continue to resound: Come Follow Me! We thank you for the gift of these seminarians called to serve in the Archdiocese of Portland in Oregon. Inspire them to imitate You, the Eternal High Priest, in sacrificial service to Your Church. Grant perseverance to our seminarians. Give them the graces they need to one day serve You faithfully as priests. May Your light shine through them to everyone they meet. Mary, Mother of the Church, the model of every vocation, help our seminarians to continue to say “yes” to the Lord who calls us to cooperate in the divine plan of salvation. Amen